When it’s Okay to Curse in Your Writing, Damn It

curse

I curse a lot, as do my characters – some of them. It’s not the classiest thing to do, but damn it, sometimes that’s just how the words come out.

My mother wasn’t a fan of swearing, although I occasionally heard her say, “shit” (the catch-all curse word of middle class America). When I was old enough to experiment with vulgarity, she told me that kind of language wasn’t for the clever. She expected more from me.

I eventually discovered Mom was right – sort of. Here are some examples:

In Shakespeare’s “The Comedy of Errors,” the characters Antipholus and Dromio, talk about a large woman, whom they could have simply called the late 16th/early 17th century equivalent of “lard ass.” However, this is fucking Shakespeare.

Antipholus: “Then she bears some breadth?”

Dromio: “No longer from head to foot than from hip to hip. She is spherical, like a globe. I could find out countries in her.”

Winston Churchill. Always pithy.
Winston Churchill. Always pithy.

Insulting, funny, and clean. You don’t have to use foul language to get your point across. British Prime Minister Winston Churchill didn’t when he verbally sparred with aristocrat Lady Nancy Witcher Langhorne Astor.

Lady Astor: “You’re drunk.”

Winston Churchill: “My dear, you are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be ugly.”

If Churchill was that pithy when drunk, I’d have hated to be on his bad side when he was sober.

But Mom wasn’t entirely right about cursing.

A study by psychologists Kristin and Timothy Jay published in Languages Science Journal concluded that, contrary to what Mom believed, people who curse are sometimes more intelligent than those who don’t.

“Unfortunately, when it comes to taboo language, it is a common assumption that people who swear frequently are lazy, do not have an adequate vocabulary, lack education, or simply cannot control themselves,” the psychologists wrote. “The overall finding of this set of studies … is a voluminous taboo lexicon may better be considered an indicator of healthy verbal abilities rather than a cover for their deficiencies.”

Yeah. Whatever they said. Fucking science, you’re awesome.

15871StopswearingSo, after all that, is it okay to curse in your writing?

That depends on three things: 1) the audience, 2) the character, and 3) the situation.

 

The Audience

Are you writing for a newspaper? A nature conservation magazine? The Watchtower? If so, then you should probably stay away from @*$^, #$%@, and maybe even %&*^#^#!@. The reader isn’t expecting the curse word, and you’re violating their safe world by using one. As a writer, your first responsibility is to the reader – always. Don’t jerk them around.

However, if you’re writing a horror novel, and the protagonist doesn’t drop a “JC” or an “MF” or two while running from an ax-wielding maniac, you’re probably not depicting the situation as accurately as you should. In this case, the audience will expect the curse word, and might consider you disingenuous for leaving it out.

The Character

On “The Simpsons,” the Reverend Lovejoy doesn’t curse because he’s a man of God. Homer Simpson does because he’s a narcissistic bastard. On “Star Trek,” Mr. Spock doesn’t curse because he’s the voice of stone-faced reason. Dr. McCoy does because, damn it, “I’m not a magician, Spock, just an old country doctor.” Samuel L. Jackson’s Neville Flynn in the movie “Snakes on a Plane” curses because he’s Samuel L. Jackson.

Any questions?
Any questions?

Flynn: “Enough is enough. I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane.”

It works for him. Have you ever heard Samuel L. Jackson narrate the parody children’s book, “Go the Fuck to Sleep”? It’s beautiful.

In Stephen King’s novel, “Misery,” the psychotic antagonist Annie Wilkes hates profanity so much she says things like “cockadoodie” and “dirty bird.” But those are her curse words, her motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane, and they work. To her, they’re just as bad, just as dirty, just as meaningful.

The Situation

Remember when I mentioned the ax-wielding maniac? Even the most polite person will forget their manners in a crisis. Did you ever hear a teacher lose their cool in high school? Hilarious, right? They were furious about something (in my case, me). That’s their motivation. It’s okay when your characters curse, but there has to be a reason for it – every single time.

Finding snakes on a plane is a pretty damn good reason.

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